Bettering Yourself Tips & Tricks

/Bettering Yourself Tips & Tricks

The Art of Forgiving.

Ah forgiveness. So fickle and annoying. It's complex and wirey.  It attaches itself to layers of circumstances each one requiring you to work through it. An apology is secondary to forgiveness. True heartfelt, admittance of guilt, behavior changing apologies are rare. They will still require you to work through the offending action(s) and the offender to forgive themselves. So, any real, half-assed, blanket apology or lack thereof is just fluff. Your only task is to work through it and let go.  Forgiveness is an act done for yourself. A grudge is exhausting to hang onto and is good [...]

By | 2017-07-07T12:57:52+00:00 July 7th, 2017|0 Comments

Don’t Pole Vault Over Mouse Turds.

Don’t pole vault over mouse turds. Just pick it up and throw it away. Yes, it’s gross. Just grab a tissue and pick it up. You don’t need to call your friends over to see it. Why? Oh great, now you are all standing around talking about how revolting it is. That was unnecessary. Do you feel better? You still need to clean it up, does it help having your friends around telling you how gross it is? If they were really your friends they would help you. Yes everyone is leaving. They don’t want to talk about your crap [...]

By | 2017-07-25T17:10:06+00:00 July 8th, 2015|0 Comments

How to Control a Crappy Situation

We had a fabulous lesson in tolerance this weekend. Learning how to control our reaction and emotions in uncontrollable circumstances is not easy. But it does get easier when we practice using the formula Event + Reaction = Outcome. We learn that we have control over how we feel and react to negative situations. Knowing that we have three options helps too.  We can change the situation, leave it or accept it.

By | 2017-07-27T17:11:44+00:00 May 19th, 2015|0 Comments

What It Means To Love Yourself.

I love hearing the ways you all use your Buff Beads.  Some people wear them as a tribute to themselves and their self-worth, almost like a symbol of where their allegiance lies. One woman, who is still grieving the loss of her husband 10 years ago, tells me that she holds them in her hands and tells herself out loud "I am so strong!" She used this technique, as well as self-compassion, to quit smoking.  Another lady who had bought Buff Kids for her pre teen daughter told me that her daughter’s feelings had been hurt by a friend and [...]

By | 2017-07-29T07:33:33+00:00 March 19th, 2015|0 Comments

Make A Habit by Vicky Jensen

This weeks guest writer is my very good friend Vicky Jensen. In one year she lost an incredible 100lbs, which she attributes to her hard work and her ability to set and meet her individual goals. You can follow her on twitter @Vickerama We all know that goal setting is good. We have heard it our whole lives.”Set goals!” “Where do you want to be in 5 years?” “What are your goals in life?” The concept isn’t new and it is definitely not unique. Goals keep you focused, they propel you forward, they hold you accountable. We can all agree – goals [...]

By | 2017-07-29T10:02:42+00:00 February 18th, 2015|0 Comments

Definition of Insanity

Someone once said, "The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results". Chronic complaining is insane. Venting feels good and can let off steam, but consistent venting about the same situation over and over is called complaining. Complaining is a waste of our energy and only creates in us more angst and negativity. Realize that you have control over your life. Most of what you do every day is by choice. You go to the job you dislike because you are choosing to be responsible. You could choose not to, but there would [...]

By | 2017-08-11T11:48:21+00:00 February 4th, 2015|Comments Off on Definition of Insanity

How to Feel Fulfilled

You're unhappy and feeling out of control of your life. Nothing ever seems to go your way and you are seeing the same negative patterns with your job, relationships, and health. Some days are better than others, but you fall into slumps and the feeling of hopelessness just washes over you. Every day is the same and besides little bursts of excitement, the drab of reality is just painful. Life feels insane and out of your control. Everything is an uphill battle. Why is this happening? Are we just meant to go through life in this comatose like daze? No. [...]

By | 2017-08-06T08:28:25+00:00 February 4th, 2015|0 Comments

If You’re Happy in the Now. Stay There.

“Clearly there are no rules.” said the sun to the moon. “For if there were you would not be able to be with me in the daylight sky. The most glorious things happen in the daylight and I am so glad to have you here with me. Oh, but to have the opportunity to see the night. How much greater that might be.” The moon was thoughtful for a moment and then with full confidence it proclaimed. “Your joy is with me and here in the sunlight sky. Why speak of what cannot be when there is joy in the [...]

By | 2017-06-22T11:53:45+00:00 October 28th, 2014|0 Comments

I Was a Movie Star Drywaller

We hear rags to riches stories all the time. They seem to always start at the extreme end of poverty and end on the complete opposite side where the person is driving a Mercedes. There are many Dream Big stories coming true that aren't as noticeable and are much more believable. I did not grow up desolate poor and my Audi Q5 is still sitting snug as a bug on my vision board, but that isn't the point of my story. In a world where we are stuck in awful jobs, relationships, and financial instability, there is an abundance of [...]

By | 2017-06-21T23:16:50+00:00 August 28th, 2014|0 Comments

5 Ways to Feel Good

One of the ideas behind the term “Buff Yourself” is to create in us a data bank filled with ways to make ourselves feel good. On my days when I'm not feeling it, all I want to do is curl up on the couch with a bottle of wine and the Fellowship of the Rings. While there were days where I have done that, it’s not really a progressive way to get to my upswing.  These are a few ways to keep yourself present and give yourself a needed Buff. Show Yourself Compassion. You mean a lot to yourself. There’s [...]

By | 2017-08-09T14:21:52+00:00 August 14th, 2014|0 Comments