Do you wonder why there are some hurts you just can't get passed? Replaying twenty-year old situations over in your head making yourself crazy? You are looking at memories from the eyes of an older wiser being. Forgive yourself for not knowing what you know now. Let it go.
Ah forgiveness. So fickle and annoying. It's complex and wirey. It attaches itself to layers of circumstances each one requiring you to work through it. An apology is secondary to forgiveness. True heartfelt, admittance of guilt, behavior changing apologies are rare. They will still require you to work through the offending action(s) and the offender to forgive themselves. So, any real, half-assed, blanket apology or lack thereof is just fluff. Your only task is to work through it and let go. Forgiveness is an act done for yourself. A grudge is exhausting to hang onto and is good [...]